I’m starting to worry about this whole being confined to the house indefinitely thing… I’m only on day 6 and I’m starting to crack. I mean, I had vicodin and PBR for breakfast today… That can’t be good. At least it was after noon, but only because I slept until 12:30. I feel like a frat boy or something. My apartment is a mess… It always is, but that’s usually because I’m never home to clean it… now I’m home all the time, but I can’t do it. I’ve really got nothing to do but lay around, watch tv, drink, get high, jerk off… I know, it’s kind of all I ever wanted out of life, but it’s not nearly as fulfilling as I imagined. It feels kind of…pathetic. Its a hell of a production just to get from one room to the other, let alone get downstairs. Even if I could get out, I can’t walk more than a couple blocks without getting winded… mind you, I walked everywhere for the past year or so, so I’m not in bad shape… it’s just taxing on your body to walk on crutches… plus the pain.
Donna is having to do everything for me… I mean I can bathe and dress myself and all that… but going to the store… the bank… taking out the trash… laundry… again, it’s not as fulfilling as you’d imagine. I’m a fiercely independent person… it’s not doing my ego much good to call the wife and ask her to pick me up a sixer and some yodels on her way home from work.
Now we’re in the midst of searching for a new apartment. I can’t really help too much. I know a few neighborhoods I’d like to be in, but neighborhoods here can vary so much from street to street… in a matter of a couple blocks you can go from hipsters and yuppies to whores and crack heads. But I’ve got to send Donna out alone to make those calls. At least my friend Saman, our 3rd roommate will be here next week… he can go with her. It just sucks to be more or less left out of the process of finding our new home. Nevermind the financial question… where exactly am I supposed to come up with the money to move in…? and to furnish it…? I hope this workman’s comp kicks in fast. I have my doubts though… word from some of the boys at work is the boss is thinking about contesting my claim. Of course…
So that’s how far I’ve come I guess… there was a time when this was my idea of vacation… sit at home, alone and do whatever you want… drink, sleep, eat fig newtons, watch discovery channel… but now it depresses the hell out of me. Maybe it speaks to my ambition, or just the fact that I’m getting old… I don’t know, but at least I got a couple paragraphs out of it instead of sitting idle and taking it…
